Your questions answered: Family, hope and everyday life in Ukraine​

​Natalia is a translator, tutor and internally displaced Ukrainian. Before the war started, she was at home, living with her parents 25 kilometres away from Kyiv. On 24 February 2022, her mum woke her with words no one should ever hear — the war had begun. Now, more than four years since the full-scale invasion of Ukraine, Natalia and her loved ones have learned to adapt to life during wartime.

Have you ever wondered what it’s like to be displaced? Natalia generously answered some of UK for UNHCR supporters’ questions, highlighting how war has affected her and how she holds onto hope despite the uncertainty.

How has your day-to-day life changed since the war began?

My day-to-day life has changed in so many ways. This last winter was extremely difficult for us in Ukraine, especially because of the electricity cuts, the lack of heating, the attacks and shootings. Life has changed in the way that we’re always prepared for something. For example, with the electricity cuts, we always have power banks ready, canned food at home, all the supplies that we might need. We have all our documents in one backpack, in one place, ready to grab and run in case something happens.

Our life has changed a lot, and we are getting used to the new normal. It’s the reality that we live in. That’s what worries me sometimes because this situation is not normal. And we’re getting used to this not being normal.

Another way my life has changed is that I read the news every day. Of course, people all over the world read the news. But here it’s so important to read the news – for the first year of the war, we were all reading the news every day. We also have a curfew. We cannot go outside from 12am to 5am. I’m okay with that because I was never really interested in nightlife, but from time to time it would be nice. But still, given the circumstances, I’m grateful to even have this life. We have food in the supermarket. We can buy clothes.

Men who are of military age face a lot more restrictions, and many are fighting on the front lines. It’s difficult to spend time with the men in my family, like my dad and boyfriend. A lot of families aren’t together. I miss the way things were before the war. But I know it will never be the same. Now that we’ve had this experience, it will never disappear from our lives.

What gives you hope when times are most difficult?

Because of the situation in Ukraine, I have an anxiety disorder and PTSD. I have a therapist, and I’ve been taking antidepressants for about a year, which has helped me a lot. Also, my loved ones – my family, my boyfriend, my friends.

The people are the main reason why I stay here in Ukraine. It’s because my loved ones are here. I could have gone abroad – I know foreign languages, I’m good at them. But I stay for my people. I love my country. I love the nature, the food, everything. For me, it would be really difficult not to live here. My boyfriend is here, and we’re a family. All of the hope that I can find, it’s in my loved ones.

How has the war changed your outlook on life?

I’ve learned how to live with uncertainty. For the first year or two, I was constantly waiting for the war to end. It’s not that I’m not waiting now, but I think I’ve accepted that it’s going on. I want it to end, but I’m not waiting every day, every second of my life. I choose to continue my life. I choose to continue living. I think almost all Ukrainians do this now. We live in the moment. If I live today, that’s great. Tomorrow will be tomorrow.

 

 

 

 

 

 

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A post shared by UK for UNHCR (@unrefugeesuk)

What are your hopes for the future?

It’s difficult to plan for the future. When the war started, I was 26, and now I’m 30. Now that I’m getting older, I’m thinking about starting a family and having children. It’s a difficult decision for women in Ukraine. Some of us decide to start a family, others decide to wait until the war ends. For me personally, I decided that I want to start a family. My thoughts have changed a lot, even over the course of these four years.

At the beginning of the war, I thought: how can someone have a child in this situation – air alarms, shootings and everything? But now, I’m thinking that if I keep waiting, it could be like this for the next five or ten years, and I will never have a family of my own.

Of course, I hope for this war to end. I hope for a peaceful life. Right now, I’m working, I’m developing my own language school. I’m in a relationship. I’m thinking about my life going forward, and of course I would like to have all of it in a peaceful country.

What is the most meaningful way people outside Ukraine can support you and others affected by the war?

I’m so grateful for the support of people in the UK. The best way they can support is to share information about Ukraine, about what’s happening here, so the world doesn’t forget. It’s also important to donate to the different charities and organisations that are operating here. The UK and Ukraine, geographically, we’re not neighbours. But the UK is one of the countries who has supported us the most. For that, I will always be grateful.

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You can learn more about Natalia’s earlier experiences of displacement here and here. 

For more information on what’s happening in Ukraine, and to support UNHCR’s vital work, please visit this page.